A.A.A.D.D.


As most of my readers know, at 69 I am no longer in the spring of youth. However things are looking rather serious as when I went to the doctor yesterday I was diagnosed with AAADD (Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder). This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the letter box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the waste paper basket under the table, and notice that it is full. So, I decide to put the letters back on the table and take out the rubbish first.

But then I think, since I’m going to be near the post box when I take out the rubbish anyway, I may as well pay the invoices first. I take my cheque book off the table, and see that there is only one cheque left.

My spare cheque book is in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of fizz I’d been drinking.

I’m going to look for my cheques, but first I need to push the can aside so that I don’t accidentally knock it over. The fizz is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the fridge to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the fizz, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye–they need water. I put the fizz on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I’ve been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I’m going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I’ll be looking for the remote, but I won’t remember that it’s on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I’ll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day: the car isn’t washed the bills aren’t paid there is a warm can of fizz sitting on the counter the flowers don’t have enough water, there is still only one cheque in my cheque book, I can’t find the remote, I can’t find my glasses, and I don’t remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I’m really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, and I’m really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I’ll try to get some help for it, but first I’ll check my e-mail….

Ampers.

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  1. #1 by The Machinist's Wife on Saturday, 24 January 2009 - 10:44 pm

    Too funny! still chuckling…I suffer from this too. I always thought it was for those who had too much on their minds…

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