The cuts won’t affect me!


Cameron is preparing the ground for a massive cut in public services and hopefully a reduction in our bloated state in order to reduce the deficit that 13 years of a psychotic Labour gave us. Bring it on I say. It will affect every man, woman and child he says, perhaps for decades. No it won’t. Not me.

You will only “suffer” if:

  • You cannot play a game of football without astroturf or floodlights, courtesy of the Council and a £3m pitch to keep da Yoof happy. In every town and village up and down the land.
  • You really liked having an Olympic pool in your town, even though you never used it.
  • You need everything translated into Somali
  • You have decided Poles are the right people to pick carrots whilst you are the right person to sit on the sofa all day claiming benefits
  • You are so incapable as a parent, you need an army of hairy lipped sandalistas to do the job for you.
  • You are incapable of taking responsibility for your own behaviour and actions
  • You demand your child has one on one tuition at my cost because it’s easier than teaching him not to stab anyone at school
  • You bought things to impress other people and can’t make the payments
  • You got your job because you are unemployable in the private sector
  • Your lifestyle “choices” make you unemployable
  • You believe that astral gems and aromatherapy are really needed in remote Welsh villages
  • You are fat and demand I buy you a mobility scooter instead of hitting the salads
  • You think it is your right to be treated equally even though you are a convicted thief
  • You think it is the States job to feed you, house you and clothe you
  • You are a Communist and expect everything for nothing, like in the 70’s.
  • You are Welsh or Scottish and used to living on handouts whilst drunkenly shouting abuse at the English, the ones paying for it all.

This has been unashamedly lifted from Old Holborn’s blog which I receive through RSS feeds every day.

Ampers

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